Friday, November 18, 2011

Golf

I am not an avid sports fan. To be blunt, I think they're boring to watch. Dance, I like, and even the endless recitals and competitions I attended in support of my little sister has not completely dampened my enthusiasm. Same goes with live theater, musicals, art museums, a whole host of things many people find boring but I enjoy. I am by no means trying to say sports are pointless or mindless and, in fact, I think society as a whole could benefit from a lot more of people participating in sports instead of just watching them-I'm all about exercise. However, I draw the line at golf.

It is, I submit, the most boring game ever invented. Chess matches are more exciting, at least the timed ones. Baseball is high on my list of "most boring sports ever" but I submit watching someone run an Ultra Marathon would also be tedious. (Heck, RUNNING the Ultra Marathon is boring at times.) Oh, and Nascar is definitely on the list as well, but back to golf. I think where golf ultimately fails for me is the lack of obvious physical effort. Yes, it takes some fine motor memory to perfect your "swing" or whatever, and a certain amount of strength for those "long drives" but honestly, you can't convince me that golfers are athletes. They don't even walk the course for goodness sake, they drive there lazy selves around in carts and have someone else carry their clubs! I submit highschool cheerleaders get more of a workout at your average highschool football game. Sheesh, half of the game revolves around the height and coarseness of GRASS.

I'm not saying golf does not require skill, it does, and lots of measuring the wind, but it seems to me such a pointless skill. At least most sports have a bit of cardiovascular effort that helps keep someone healthy. Brian likes golf. He can even watch it on TV without falling asleep. He tried to explain how the challenge with all the variables of grass and weather and "conditions" and the course and which clubs to use made the sport some how interesting and as a good wife I nod, and agree, and go find something else to do. I can see, if I squint my mental interest meter really tightly, how golf might be interesting to some people, but I fear it will remain forever on the top of my boring list. I could rant more, but I'll let Robin Williams do so, he is far more persuasive.

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